The Secret to Trusting Yourself Again

You already know, you just stopped listening.

Hi beautiful souls,

I’m writing to you from my warm and cozy office, where snowflakes fall behind the window in front of me. It’s been a frigid January here in Michigan, where staying warm is the number one priority. I recently polled my community to ask them what they’d like more guidance on, and self-trust beat out any other category by a mile. It got me thinking about my own personal journey with self-trust and how it’s evolved over time. It wasn’t something that was always easily accessible to me.

In fact, I’ve spent much of my life in a constant state of self-doubt. Always reaching for the answers in the next book, another guru, a new professional. If I were facing a big decision, I would check in with everyone else but myself.

My husband

My sisters

Google

Hundreds of YouTube videos

Endless texts to my mentor

All because I was looking for clarity to trust in what I already knew.

Believing in myself meant ditching self-doubt. Not an easy thing to do when you’ve been conditioned to outsource your power.

You don’t just wake up one day fully honoring your intuition. It’s a muscle that needs to be worked. My self-trust muscle was weak, but it was about to get much stronger through repetition.

When I started reading the Akashic Records, messages and insights would flow to me. I would question it. Doubt it. Reason with it. Until one day, the messages became quieter. They were less frequent and less obvious. I remember like it was yesterday. I went to the Records and asked to be shown why my downloads seemingly stopped without warning. My Higher Self stepped forward and told me, Dear one, you don’t trust. Trust in what is coming through, it is your biggest ally in this. Don’t try to make sense of things because you are blocking your own flow and light.

Wait a minute? It was me who was blocking my own Divine flow and insight? I began to cry because I felt the truth in that. I knew I was analyzing the transmissions as if I were reading a weather report, debating the clouds, overthinking the patterns, and determining the chances of rain. Not realizing that the sky is already doing what it’s doing, and that overanalyzing will never stop the storm. The lesson was to learn to trust nature and to move through it with ease, not force.

I made a commitment: if I were to continue reading the Records, I would fully trust whatever flowed to me. Even if that meant seeing myself reading the Records for others when that was never on my radar. The previous self-doubting version of me would’ve said no way, but because I was learning to trust in myself and my abilities, I knew it was destined.

I no longer wanted to give my power over to the part of me that confuses making sense with knowing. I learned to surrender to whatever came to me. Not through reasoning but in trust. It’s a blind faith that feels like you’re leaping off a cliff and that you will be caught by a power that is beyond you.

When control and overthinking have been your safety net, taking the leap with trust can feel like life or death.

But I promise you it doesn’t have to feel like this forever. Confidence in yourself is one decision away. It’s not about fixing yourself, it’s about remembering what you already know. It’s about tuning into the inner wise guide within and letting her lead the way.

Why We Learned to Stop Listening

We learn as kids to give away our confidence early in life. Taught to obey adults because it’s respectful, even when we disagree. To believe that because someone is older and bigger than you, they know better than you. And they do, sometimes, but not all the time.

I really wish people would stop demanding their kids be agreeable just for the sake of respect. This is a permission slip for our kids to give away their power.

Their voice.

Their sovereignty.

You see it on the playground. A child falls. Scrapes their knee, their hands. Starts crying. And what do we do? You’re okay! You’re fine! Be brave!

But what if they’re not okay? What if it hurts? What if they’re embarrassed and scared and need someone to just hold them?

Instead, we teach them to override their feelings. To question whether the pain is real. To wonder if they should be okay when they’re clearly not. That’s where self-doubt gets planted.

The problem with this is that kids become trained to stop checking in with their inner knowing altogether and to look for someone they see as an authority for answers and reassurance. This is when outsourcing begins to take hold of us and forms a belief that we can’t be trusted.

And for women, there’s another layer. We are consistently taught that being likable matters more than being right.

Don’t make waves.

Don’t be difficult.

Smile and nod when you disagree.

Trust the authority figure – especially if he has a title.

Men get a different message. Trust your gut. Make the call. Be the power player. Take the risk.

Women learn to abandon themselves to keep the peace. Men learn to abandon themselves to be in control. Both leave parts of them behind, but with different results.

We’re all trained to betray ourselves; however, a man is encouraged to stand behind his truth, whereas a woman learns that I’m sorry should be a preface for permission.

Women make themselves small while men make themselves hard. That’s where self-trust gets left behind. This is not a gender war; it’s naming the reality of how we are trained to live.

We grow up, and we continue down the path of self-betrayal and doubt. We mimic what our parents demonstrate. We hand over our power to systems greater than us.

We trust:

The government knows what’s best

The medical system to have all the answers

The media to tell us the truth

The expert with the degree over our own lived experience

I’m not saying burn it all down. I’m not anti-medicine or anti- expertise. But somewhere along the way, we stopped using systems as resources to support us and started using them as replacements for our own inner knowing. Once again, giving our power over to external sources who have never lived our personal experience.

There is nothing wrong with seeking outside guidance; the issue is when we make that guidance the holy grail of all knowing and abandon our own Divine guidance. The quiet nudge that tells you something is off or the whisper that tells you that you have a better solution.

Several years ago, I was working with a mentor I deeply respected. She had the credentials. The experience. The influence I dreamed of for myself.

And she told me, with confidence, that the direction I was feeling pulled toward was a distraction. That I needed to stay focused on the path she saw for me. I felt it immediately. The resistance in my body. The quiet no bubbling under the surface. But I ignored it because she was the expert. She’d built what I wanted to build. Surely she knew better than I did.

So I followed her advice. For six months, I pushed down what I felt and did what I was supposed to do. I was miserable. Not because her advice was bad. It wasn’t. It just wasn’t for me, and I knew it, but doubted myself because she was the expert living the dream. Her dream. Not mine.

The thing I’d felt pulled toward? The distraction? That became the foundation of everything I do now. But I lost six months because I trusted her knowing more than my own.

There’s a hefty cost. Not just time. But the slow erosion of your inner compass. When you override yourself enough times, you stop hearing the signal altogether, and then you believe you can no longer trust yourself.

The Body Knows First

You can’t trust yourself if you don’t feel safe in your body. Self-trust always starts there. In the nervous system. The gut. The cells. The Fascia.

Here’s where it’s not…

Not in your head

Not in positive affirmations or mantras

Not in your vision board

Self-trust starts in the place where you can feel things before you can name them. When your body is in a constant state of survival, it’s tense and gripping, leaving little space for insight. Your intuition gets drowned out by panic, which reinforces self-doubt.

Think about it. When you’re anxious, your mind is racing and searching, and your shoulders are up, stuck between your ears. Can you hear the soft whisper of your inner voice telling you the truth of the matter? No. Of course not.

Survival mode doesn’t cooperate with your intuition. It screams and throws an internal tantrum like a child, and who can really connect with honesty and truth in that moment? I certainly can’t. Although I’ve tried.

This is why Somatic work is so important in learning to trust in yourself. The body holds vital information that your mind hasn’t yet caught up to.

There’s a tightness in your chest when someone is lying to you.

A pit in your chest long before you know why.

Your body relaxes when you’re around people who feel safe.

Your body will never hear the truth if it’s always bracing for danger. It’s too busy trying to survive the moment. Self-trust requires space, safety, and softness. Perfection is not a requirement, just presence.

Use your breath as an anchor to tune into your intuition. It’s a guide to your truth. So often I see people holding their breath.

In fact, I was that person. I still catch myself bracing and have to remind myself to breathe. Big deep belly breaths that flow. My only tattoo says Breathe, on my wrist as a reminder to let go and trust.

Self Trust Is Built, Not Given

You don’t just wake up one day and trust yourself. I wish it worked that way. Our planet’s systems work so effectively to train the masses NOT to trust themselves.

Imagine for a moment a world where people lived fully in their power. Allowing their intuition to guide them towards a life of peace, prosperity, and self-sovereignty. Feels like flow and ease, right?

That’s why I am so passionate about teaching people how to trust in their intuition. Because if we learn to honor ourselves, we can then love and honor one another. It’s a natural byproduct of self-trust.

Self-trust is like a muscle that strengthens through repetition.

We put in the reps by…

Doing what we say we’re going to do

Taking action on the small voice within

Building a track record of following through

Prioritizing what we need over someone else’s wants

That’s how trust begins to grow. Do this over and over, and see that you can actually trust yourself. Even in times that seem uncertain or wobbly.

I think it’s important to note that Divine Guidance and trust are not separate. As in the story I shared, often Divine Guidance is your Higher Self leading you toward truth and alignment. Trusting in the instant revelations, the A’Has, the quick takeaways that seemingly come from nowhere, is your Higher Self speaking to you.

When I started on my journey of learning to trust myself, I would write down in my notes app on my phone any thought, feeling, sense, or knowing that dropped in without prompting from my thinking brain. By doing this, I began to see how magical and miraculous The Universe is. It becomes a game to see what gift can drop in your lap at any given moment. The more you notice, the quicker and stronger the messages come.

If you want to build and strengthen your intuition, you’ve got to trust in yourself and a power beyond you. Because they are teammates. Trusting yourself is trusting that Divine wisdom is moving through you.

You’re not separate from it. You are it! You are the vessel.

By ignoring your intuition, you’re telling The Universe, God, Source, Higher Self, however you name it, that your ego knows better and has it handled. This is cutting off assistance from a higher power. And when you act from a place of nervousness, worry, or self-doubt, then your life will be arranged accordingly. Which leads to struggle, friction, and unnecessary drama.

Practical Takeaway.

Developing the trust muscle takes time, practice, and a commitment to notice when doubt starts to creep in. You’ve got to be aware, awake, and conscious of your habits.

Make one small commitment to yourself this week. Not a life-changing one, but a tiny one. Something so small you can’t talk yourself out of it.

For example:

I’ll go to bed by 10 pm twice this week

I’ll say no to one thing I don’t want to do

I’ll sit in silence for five minutes without my phone

I’ll eat lunch away from my desk three times

I’ll stop mid-scroll and ask myself what I actually need right now

Pick one and start putting in the reps.

That’s how the trust muscle strengthens. Not with a massive overhaul, but with one promise kept at a time. Seems insiginificant but you’re sending the message to your subconscious that you keep your word when you commit.

I also invite you to notice, when a subtle voice arrives, how you react.

Is it your instinct to question it?

Do you make up reasons why it’s not true?

Are you worried or anxious searching for a new answer?

Then be in the body and notice what feels true. Your body is your most trusted guide through this process.

If you would like to explore this further, try this journaling prompt:

Think of one area where you’ve been ignoring what you know.

Maybe it’s your body screaming for rest while you keep pushing.

Maybe it’s a relationship that’s been off for months.

Or possibly it’s a career move you keep talking yourself out of.

Pick one thing. Just one. And ask yourself:

What do I already know that I’m pretending I don’t?

Set a timer for 5 minutes. Write without stopping. Don’t censor. Don’t judge.

Let yourself say the things you haven’t been letting yourself say.

Notice what comes up.

Notice the fear that follows it.

And notice the knowing underneath all of it.

That knowing? That’s what you’re learning to trust again.

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Like you, for many years, more than I would like to admit, I didn’t trust myself because I’d been taught not to. I handed my power to everyone with a title, a degree, a louder voice than mine.

And I lost myself in the process.

Not being in my personal power caused not only heartache but also autoimmune issues that persisted. It was my body’s way of fighting back. For me to finally recognize my truth.

The turning point came when my Higher Self visited me in the Akashic Records. I stopped asking for more validation, reasoning my way out of the truth, and started listening to a power higher than me.

I started small. I trusted in the messages, the signs, the symbols that came to me through instantaneous sights and thoughts.

And slowly, things started to change.

Not because I figured it all out. But because I started honoring what I knew, my confidence grew.

I started to read the Akashic Records for others and created a soul-aligned business that fuels me, because I built my trust muscle.

That’s what I want for you.

Not to trust me. Not to trust the next expert or guru or system. But to trust yourself. Because you already know. You’ve always known.

Self-trust is the foundation for your evolution and soul growth. Your intuition. Your boundaries. Your life path and next aligned move.

If you want to learn more about how to trust yourself and your intuition, knowing how your intuition speaks to you is the next step.

Everyone has a dominant clair ability (how you perceive beyond physical senses, receive insight through subtle intuitive channels like inner seeing, feeling, knowing, or hearing). 👉Take my free What’s Your Intuitive Strength quiz to find out. Visit www.nikkiheals.com/free-quiz.

What are you ready to trust about yourself? Send notice to The Universe by commenting below.

About Soul & Mind Alchemy Publication

This space is for spiritually seeking women ready to heal and live aligned with their Higher Soul Self. By subscribing, you’ll learn to heal trauma, rewire old subconscious patterns, and trust in the guidance from your Higher Self to live with ease and flow. Through channeled messages, intuitive teachings, and real conversations, I help you reconnect to your own inner wisdom using the Akashic Records and subconscious rewiring work. I’m Nikki K.— Certified Intuitive Practitioner, Akashic Channel, Shamanic Healer, and Soul Writer — walking this path right beside you.

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